The Awesome and Senseless History of Assault Cube
Zombie Yahtzee busted out of his grave and..
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grabbed a beer, and made a toast
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What a glorious day.
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Then another mysterious soldier joined the battle from far away lands yet unknown to his peers...
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And his name was "Orynge Fagyo".
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He began camping and noobing until he realised...
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that the other members of Xu had left him to go be pro, and he was the only noob remaining :(
BUT THEN...
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randumkiwi jumped into the mix, dressed in a hula skirt and coconut bra, only to realize he was over dressed for the occasion
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So he stripped off all his clothes and met some horny old scientists and
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he died.
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Further investigation found that the COD (cause of death) was exhaustion
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from fighting with Gordon Freeman.
But then the wrong game
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died.
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this made him
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enter in a gema server.
But he accidentally...
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beat it first try with the shotgun D:
then.......
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he died again.
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Then |BC|Wolf was killed by a hunter for maniacally killing people.
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But he revived and stabbed D155blablabla in the nuts, making him the most
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reviled man on AC, but thankfully Morgan was there to...
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orally resuscitate D155's eviscerated jewels.
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Which was done with such a passion that Mael wished he was D155's jewels because he...
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had just died.
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At Mael's funeral Lantry died. This caused him to stop posting about people dying. Suddenly however, ac_palenque was played on a public server causing
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massive cerebral hemorrhages by all present which only led to more...
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death.
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Then everybody dies... again. The end?
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Which in turn led to more deaths. Eventually there were so many deaths that there were no people left alive, the only species that survived were the trolls, because they have infinite lives and also a troll shield which can absorb 99.9% of the attack. The other 0.01% the trolls just absorb and become more troll-ish.
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Whom MKeezy, as the King of Trolls, absorbs into his awesomeness and re-releases upon the AC-verse in a rash of spitefully decadent behavior that would never suit a "contributor".
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Because he is dead.
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